Tuesday, November 30, 2010


Remembering his smell, his skin, his hair, his smile, his fingers and toes...but then I remember...his still body....no giggles, no cry, no breath. I feel crazy sometimes to cherish moments that most would think was taboo. As this month continues and we get closer to Elijah's delivery anniversary date...I am amazed with the anxiety and grief that still has a hold of me... for "that day" to get here...not as bad as it used to be...but still amazed...6 years later... My whole body still aches for him. My words are not eloquent or full of wisdom...the truth is...I just miss the thought of everything that would be him. His room, his clothes all over the house...his book bag, tripping over his shoes by the door...all things him.
God please give comfort, peace and Hope to mommies who have lost and long for their children. Helping day by day and sometimes minute by minute to offer us love from you Father to know your ways are more amazing and grand that we can even imagine.


Sandy said...

I don't have any amazing words to bring you comfort...as you already know, I'm all too quickly approaching the one year mark of Jonah's VERY preterm birth. And I relate all too well with your post. So my only words of comfort are please know that I am thinking of you and praying for you.

Jaclyn said...

I'll be praying for you!!!