Happy 5th Birthday big guy...can't believe it has been 5 whole years since you entered and exited our lives all in the same moment. You left so suddenly that we didn't even get to really know you. I can only imagine the great young man that you have become in heaven. Today is filled with all the thoughts of what could have beens'...the snuggles, the belly laughs, the lazy Saturday mornings in bed watching cartoons and yes even the moments that you would be placed in time outs...crazy I know...but I miss even those. I really don't wonder what you would look like...I look at your brother and sister and that give me some idea of your beautiful face...but I also know...you would be you. I wish I could fly to heaven even for a moment to sneak a kiss and hug. I would meet you on the corner of a star and embrace you with all the love I have stored up for you all these years...and in one moment, you would know all that you have meant to me...
Happy birthday my guy...loving you so much...and praying GOD is throwing you an amazing celebration with his presence.
Loving you to the moon and the stars...
Mommy
Monday, December 28, 2009
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Merry CHRISTmas
Wanting you wish you all a Merry CHRISTmas. Know the holiday season is always difficult when you have a loved one who is not with you any longer. It brings a flood of memories which are happy in nature but in reality brings great grief since the memories are just that...and you can no longer talk, touch or laugh with the one you loved so much. Praying that GOD will ease your hearts and comfort you. Also, be hopeful...that GOD is wanting you to remember the reason for the Christmas holiday...CHRIST...his only son came to us. It is not the Christmas cards(no mine did NOT get out again this year) or the cookies made, the presents bought and wrapped. Or the presents that we recieved...no MP3, sweater or toy under the tree can compare to the greatest gift. Jesus! This is HIS birthday...and we should celebrate it as that.
Praying that all of you remember to rejoice in the one and only KING...John 3:16
Praying that all of you remember to rejoice in the one and only KING...John 3:16
Thursday, November 19, 2009
The POWER in you!
Ok...I have been convicted by a friend that I needed to write a post, since it has been a while....(thanks J. so here we go).
Right how our church is going through Ephesians. Paul has a way of writing great letters to his friends in Christ. Last week was verses Ephesians 1:15-23...crib note version...
"The power that conquered the grave...lives in me!" (Powerful stuff)
I have "meditated" on this a lot this week...so many times I again start to think that I can do things on my own and don't need to "bother" God with my issues or prayers.(but I think he already has an idea of what they are..ha.haa)
But then I remember that God sent the Holy Spirit to live within me...and THAT power lives in me...I feel like I am not doing things alone and that my biggest fan is helping...and that anything; any trial or suffering is possible to overcome because the power of Christ lives in ME(and you too!) ...and with that ANYTHING is possible.
As we are approaching the Holidays, this is usually when I begin to dread Elijah's delivery day. But for some reason I have great peace about it this year, I don't want you to think that I still don't have great grief about him not being here or that I have "gotten over it" or have forgotten the could-have-beens with him in our lives...but the hard fact is, life does go on, and I have started to move along side it once again. I have started to see the impact of Elijah in our lives( I will post about this at a later date...be watching) if even for a short time and the unimaginable journey that GOD has placed before me, even through the lost of Elijah, nothing I ever would have wished for, but to tell you the truth:
GOD is good in ALL things...
Ephisians 1:18-19
18I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, 19and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength,
As some of you are struggling with many trials in your life or are struggling to become a believer or not blame God for the trials that this broken world throws your way...also read
Ephisians 2:8-10
8For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9not by works, so that no one can boast. 10For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
He has called out...with ownership to you...THIS ONE IS MINE...
Right how our church is going through Ephesians. Paul has a way of writing great letters to his friends in Christ. Last week was verses Ephesians 1:15-23...crib note version...
"The power that conquered the grave...lives in me!" (Powerful stuff)
I have "meditated" on this a lot this week...so many times I again start to think that I can do things on my own and don't need to "bother" God with my issues or prayers.(but I think he already has an idea of what they are..ha.haa)
But then I remember that God sent the Holy Spirit to live within me...and THAT power lives in me...I feel like I am not doing things alone and that my biggest fan is helping...and that anything; any trial or suffering is possible to overcome because the power of Christ lives in ME(and you too!) ...and with that ANYTHING is possible.
As we are approaching the Holidays, this is usually when I begin to dread Elijah's delivery day. But for some reason I have great peace about it this year, I don't want you to think that I still don't have great grief about him not being here or that I have "gotten over it" or have forgotten the could-have-beens with him in our lives...but the hard fact is, life does go on, and I have started to move along side it once again. I have started to see the impact of Elijah in our lives( I will post about this at a later date...be watching) if even for a short time and the unimaginable journey that GOD has placed before me, even through the lost of Elijah, nothing I ever would have wished for, but to tell you the truth:
GOD is good in ALL things...
Ephisians 1:18-19
18I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, 19and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength,
As some of you are struggling with many trials in your life or are struggling to become a believer or not blame God for the trials that this broken world throws your way...also read
Ephisians 2:8-10
8For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9not by works, so that no one can boast. 10For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
He has called out...with ownership to you...THIS ONE IS MINE...
Monday, October 12, 2009
Right or wrong
Lately I have been struggling with the rights and wrongs of the world and decisions that I make and that are made around me.
Since becoming a "believer/follower" I always try to live my life and make decisions on the word or the truth that God has written in the Bible...I often think about (I know you have all heard this before) but, WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?!?
This could be the question you ask yourself when you see a homeless person or a person struggling to carry something and trying to open a door...do you help or not.
But what do you do when life throws you a curve ball, something that is a real test of your character..."the stuff that you are made of". When you fill yourself up with what his desire, the answer is simple...follow after him and you will know the truth and the answer to your curve ball. But when fear, anger, frustration, doubt etc...fills you up...well...all craziness happens. You become someone other than who you and most importantly God wants you to be. I guess it is not the curve ball that I should be worried about, but am I being honoring to God while I am playing the game.
I think that Satan sends his workers to stir things up, sometimes I feel like he is sitting in a lounge chair eating popcorn watching my life play out like a movie for his entertainment...saying, "Watch this part...wait to you see how she handles this"...laughing and getting enjoyment out of when I fall.
"Those who seek the truth will find it and live by it...those who don't seek the truth will find no truth but their own."
I thought this saying so fit about the truths that we seek after...It is clear to me that if you are always seeking after him...you may fail and struggle but you know that your heart is still following after him and HIS truths, but if GOD is NOT your compass that you create your own rules and make your truth the law that you live by.
I know none of this probably makes any sense. But, just something on my mind...
Since becoming a "believer/follower" I always try to live my life and make decisions on the word or the truth that God has written in the Bible...I often think about (I know you have all heard this before) but, WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?!?
This could be the question you ask yourself when you see a homeless person or a person struggling to carry something and trying to open a door...do you help or not.
But what do you do when life throws you a curve ball, something that is a real test of your character..."the stuff that you are made of". When you fill yourself up with what his desire, the answer is simple...follow after him and you will know the truth and the answer to your curve ball. But when fear, anger, frustration, doubt etc...fills you up...well...all craziness happens. You become someone other than who you and most importantly God wants you to be. I guess it is not the curve ball that I should be worried about, but am I being honoring to God while I am playing the game.
I think that Satan sends his workers to stir things up, sometimes I feel like he is sitting in a lounge chair eating popcorn watching my life play out like a movie for his entertainment...saying, "Watch this part...wait to you see how she handles this"...laughing and getting enjoyment out of when I fall.
"Those who seek the truth will find it and live by it...those who don't seek the truth will find no truth but their own."
I thought this saying so fit about the truths that we seek after...It is clear to me that if you are always seeking after him...you may fail and struggle but you know that your heart is still following after him and HIS truths, but if GOD is NOT your compass that you create your own rules and make your truth the law that you live by.
I know none of this probably makes any sense. But, just something on my mind...
Friday, October 9, 2009
Remember
October 9-15th is Baby Loss Awareness week...as observed by the United Kingdom...on the 15th at 7pm...those who have lost a child are asked to light a candle for 1 hour in remembrance and participate in the "Wave of Light". I don't live in the UK...but I thought that this would be a special way to honor out little ones...just the thought that the heavens can see a wave of little lights flickering across the earth as an act of love and remembrance gives me goosebumps...
Thursday, September 17, 2009
GOD is Good
Hello all...hope you are having a great Fall. Hard to believe that Summer is over. In one of my last posts about Healing a Broken Heart...I didn't know how true it would all be when I wrote it...(surrounding yourself with others that are suffering trials and have broken hearts). Since then a friend has approached me about helping her with a biblical support group for mothers who have lost a child(ren) at any stage...as a mirror of a group that is in a surrounding town...many emails have gone back and forth with the original group and it looks like it may all be "in the works". WOW...his timing...is always...his timing. Though I would rather have my little babies with me...Sometimes I think that this is the role that they were to play all along in my life...not physically being here everyday...but the impact so important and intimately special, none the less. I ask you all for prayer that if this is how God wants me to serve him that he will make it happen. And if not, he will lead me down another road to serve him and shout his glory to all that will listen.
Monday, September 14, 2009
His beauty
Here are some of my pics from our Colorado trip...and a few beautiful surprises once we got home..the ones that turned out are Gods doing not mine...
Sunday, August 23, 2009
How to heal a broken heart.
As I continue on my journey that God has set before me...I continue to struggle with a broken heart of missing my little ones and yearning for more to add laughter into this already loud and silly house...I have found a few things that have begun to heal my heart. This may sound "bad" but one way to start to heal is to surround yourself with other that are also in pain and need help or assistance in some way. You may gain a lot of comfort and great friendships may blossom from this connection, there truly is ALWAYS someone who is hurting and grieving more than you. But as he reminds me over and over again..."it is not all about you-it is about me and my kingdom".
I have tried to help others in different ways the last few years...just the knowing that someone is being helped from a small action that I do...is all for HIM...I have just decided that as a stranger may benefit from the time or item that I donate...I am truly doing it to honor my KING...he has given me so much.
Last week our church went through Matthew 25:35.... WOW...huge thump on the head for me...God himself could have been standing in front of me saying..."are there limits of what you will do for ME!"
Challenge for the week(or more )do kind acts for those around you or a total stranger...it will create a ripple affect and others will benefit from one act of kindness...ideas:
Pay for the meal of the person behind you in the drive through...be prepared that they may be getting lunch for the whole office...not that that happened...ha...ha....or drop something off at the food pantry or homeless shelter in your area...YES...you have one...you just need to find it. Or donate school supplies to the local school.
I have tried to help others in different ways the last few years...just the knowing that someone is being helped from a small action that I do...is all for HIM...I have just decided that as a stranger may benefit from the time or item that I donate...I am truly doing it to honor my KING...he has given me so much.
Last week our church went through Matthew 25:35.... WOW...huge thump on the head for me...God himself could have been standing in front of me saying..."are there limits of what you will do for ME!"
Challenge for the week(or more )do kind acts for those around you or a total stranger...it will create a ripple affect and others will benefit from one act of kindness...ideas:
Pay for the meal of the person behind you in the drive through...be prepared that they may be getting lunch for the whole office...not that that happened...ha...ha....or drop something off at the food pantry or homeless shelter in your area...YES...you have one...you just need to find it. Or donate school supplies to the local school.
Friday, August 14, 2009
It is funny that something a simple as getting a hair cut can bring up the memory and name of Elijah...you can tell people who have suffered grief before in their life...they ask question after question..without judgement of how you answer.
As I was getting my yearly hair cut(and my guy and gal were being patient;0) the stylist started asking questions about me ...are we done having kids, why so many years between them...and the dreaded question how many do I have. I usually say two. Just seems to make people feel bad when you tell them the whole story. But it was how she asked...like she knew something was "up". So I nicely said...well I have been blessed to be pregnant 4 times, but God blessed me even more with the two he let me keep for now. (and I didn't even cry-yeah me) I can't believe he gave me the words. He is great that way. If you are reading this and know of someone who has suffered a loss of any kind, husband, wife, child, parent, friend...please ask them questions about their loved one. I always have a great feeling of love and little glimpse of parenting Elijah when I get to say his name or talk about him, if even for a second.
Hoping to post some pictures of our Colorado trip. I always feel close to God...but something special about praying in the mountains...it is awesome.
As I was getting my yearly hair cut(and my guy and gal were being patient;0) the stylist started asking questions about me ...are we done having kids, why so many years between them...and the dreaded question how many do I have. I usually say two. Just seems to make people feel bad when you tell them the whole story. But it was how she asked...like she knew something was "up". So I nicely said...well I have been blessed to be pregnant 4 times, but God blessed me even more with the two he let me keep for now. (and I didn't even cry-yeah me) I can't believe he gave me the words. He is great that way. If you are reading this and know of someone who has suffered a loss of any kind, husband, wife, child, parent, friend...please ask them questions about their loved one. I always have a great feeling of love and little glimpse of parenting Elijah when I get to say his name or talk about him, if even for a second.
Hoping to post some pictures of our Colorado trip. I always feel close to God...but something special about praying in the mountains...it is awesome.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Quotes
Quotes... these are some quotes that I have come across the last few years...that have touched my heart or hit me hard...I would love to post some of yours if you want...let me know...ENJOY!!!
Hurt is a funny thing ....what make one person angry will give another great grief.
If nothing changes...nothing changes
God doesn't have grandchildren, only children
Pain is...weakness leaving your body.
Service is the Rent you pay for HOPE!
Everyday is a gift, that is why they say it is the present.
I have not yet met a man who is wearthy of what I have to give him
There are three things that you need to be ready to marry....the right place, the right guy and the right time.
Once two lives touch they can never truly be separte again.
My faith will be my eyes.
"We love Him because He first loved us." ~1 John 4:9-10
"Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light." ~ 2 Corinthians 11:14
"Stand still and consider the wondrous works of God." ~ Job 37:14
Hurt is a funny thing ....what make one person angry will give another great grief.
If nothing changes...nothing changes
God doesn't have grandchildren, only children
Pain is...weakness leaving your body.
Service is the Rent you pay for HOPE!
Everyday is a gift, that is why they say it is the present.
I have not yet met a man who is wearthy of what I have to give him
There are three things that you need to be ready to marry....the right place, the right guy and the right time.
Once two lives touch they can never truly be separte again.
My faith will be my eyes.
"We love Him because He first loved us." ~1 John 4:9-10
"Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light." ~ 2 Corinthians 11:14
"Stand still and consider the wondrous works of God." ~ Job 37:14
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Another sad day at our house
Last Thursday we had to put our special, loving, devoted, and funny dog Shadow to sleep...he had lived a long, fun and happy life...but it still was so hard to make the decision to do that for him. He (we think) was about 15ish. The "we think" comes from the fact that he was a great find that we found at the animal shelter...I would love to share the story of how he came to us...to explain how special he was to us for 12 years.
My husband wanted to get a puppy...so after searching...I think that we both decided we could not spend $300+ on a papered dog...so we thought the animal shelter would be a place to get the puppy that my husband was hoping for. He was looking for a dog to train and possibly hunt with. He had gone many times to the shelter without me and finally found "the one"...a puppy. So I went one day to look at him...it was days before Christmas..so a little present for us in our new home...so we thought. As he showed me this puppy...he was cute..but I was not sold...I kept thinking this little guy will not have any trouble getting a good home...but probably not ours. As I looked down the long...aisle of cages...I spotted a black lab mix dog..not old..but not a puppy either. Just looking at him...he did not bark like the other dogs trying to get our attention. He had given up...you could see it in his big brown eyes. I asked to take him into the visit room. As I was petting him I raised my hands to bounce a tennis ball for him to chase...and he shrunk down as if I was going to hit him...THAT WAS IT...he was going home with us. Usually they make you wait 48 hours until you can take your new member home...but for some reason they said we could take him now. As I was filling out all of the paper work and ready to leave...one of the staff pulled my hubby aside and told him that he had gotten a "note" that they were to put him down that night...that they had held onto him for longer than they were supposed to just hoping he would find a home...WOW...goosebumps...everytime I remember how he came into our lives...so many memories and fun times.
How he would smell the strawberries that were in the grocery bag...how he would do a little teenager HUFF, when he didn't get his way. Or how he would always be there the last few years as tears would stream down my face...always sensing that I needed him.
As most of you who read my blog..know that I am a "religious folk"...many have asked if I believe that my dog will be in heaven when I get there...well I don't really know. I have had a conversation with God about this a lot the last few weeks...but as I was preparing lessons for July for children's church...Noah and the Ark was the lesson for July..no...really.
Like I said...I don't know if animals are taken to heaven...but I know that they are a beautiful part of God's creation. And that God doesn't make mistakes...And that they were important enough when all the world was sinning so much for God to command Noah to save his family and two of every animal and bird...so thinking maybe...
Genesis 6-9:17 GOOD STUFF...
also check out http://www.rainbowbridge.com/
click on the poem icon on the lower right...tears...tears...
Just a nice support for ones who have lost a pet.
My husband wanted to get a puppy...so after searching...I think that we both decided we could not spend $300+ on a papered dog...so we thought the animal shelter would be a place to get the puppy that my husband was hoping for. He was looking for a dog to train and possibly hunt with. He had gone many times to the shelter without me and finally found "the one"...a puppy. So I went one day to look at him...it was days before Christmas..so a little present for us in our new home...so we thought. As he showed me this puppy...he was cute..but I was not sold...I kept thinking this little guy will not have any trouble getting a good home...but probably not ours. As I looked down the long...aisle of cages...I spotted a black lab mix dog..not old..but not a puppy either. Just looking at him...he did not bark like the other dogs trying to get our attention. He had given up...you could see it in his big brown eyes. I asked to take him into the visit room. As I was petting him I raised my hands to bounce a tennis ball for him to chase...and he shrunk down as if I was going to hit him...THAT WAS IT...he was going home with us. Usually they make you wait 48 hours until you can take your new member home...but for some reason they said we could take him now. As I was filling out all of the paper work and ready to leave...one of the staff pulled my hubby aside and told him that he had gotten a "note" that they were to put him down that night...that they had held onto him for longer than they were supposed to just hoping he would find a home...WOW...goosebumps...everytime I remember how he came into our lives...so many memories and fun times.
How he would smell the strawberries that were in the grocery bag...how he would do a little teenager HUFF, when he didn't get his way. Or how he would always be there the last few years as tears would stream down my face...always sensing that I needed him.
As most of you who read my blog..know that I am a "religious folk"...many have asked if I believe that my dog will be in heaven when I get there...well I don't really know. I have had a conversation with God about this a lot the last few weeks...but as I was preparing lessons for July for children's church...Noah and the Ark was the lesson for July..no...really.
Like I said...I don't know if animals are taken to heaven...but I know that they are a beautiful part of God's creation. And that God doesn't make mistakes...And that they were important enough when all the world was sinning so much for God to command Noah to save his family and two of every animal and bird...so thinking maybe...
Genesis 6-9:17 GOOD STUFF...
also check out http://www.rainbowbridge.com/
click on the poem icon on the lower right...tears...tears...
Just a nice support for ones who have lost a pet.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Oh...man...again!!!
I was at the swimming pool tonight with my daughter at swimming lessons and was being introduced to another mom there...when I took a look at her belly...oh so cute...yes, she was pregnant. Then there was the mad rush of jealousy and envy...I kept thinking for real!! I had truly thought that I was over these feelings of seeing a pregnant woman...and BAM!!! "REALLY !!!!!". I am so very blessed to have two children alive and well with me...still, my heart longs for more children to add to our family. I started thinking that maybe because what we have gone through, I will ALWAYS look at things differently. Pregnant women, newborn babies, the cry of a baby, the baby isle in a store. I always feel like I am looking back, reliving those moments or days...playing them over and over, not wanting to let go of what has happened; because it is all that I have of my babies...crazy, I know. I once heard a comment that a counselor said to a struggling family about grief and the loss that someone was going through of a loved one that had a traumatic death... You keep replaying their death or details of their death everyday..over and over in your mind...but in reality...they only suffered death once...
Don't think that I am wanting to forget...or that I am suggesting to ANYONE...to forget their loved one...oh ...my..how could you do that. But I feel like I am looking back instead of embracing what happened and applying it to today. Looking forward with the past tightly cuddled in my hand.
But once again...God places his words before me to comfort and grant me peace.
The story of Lot and his wife...Lot's wife looked back after God told them not to...she was then turned into a pillar of salt.
I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 3:13-14
But my fave for this week...
1 John 3:20 God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything
Glory be to GOD in ALL things
Don't think that I am wanting to forget...or that I am suggesting to ANYONE...to forget their loved one...oh ...my..how could you do that. But I feel like I am looking back instead of embracing what happened and applying it to today. Looking forward with the past tightly cuddled in my hand.
But once again...God places his words before me to comfort and grant me peace.
The story of Lot and his wife...Lot's wife looked back after God told them not to...she was then turned into a pillar of salt.
I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 3:13-14
But my fave for this week...
1 John 3:20 God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything
Glory be to GOD in ALL things
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Items in a jar
Yes...I have placed an item in my jar, two actually. I am trying to be creative with the jar being "half full" attitude instead of half empty...oh yeah, there was a pun intended.
The first item I placed in my jar was a rock...nothing great and awesome about it. Though, I think I spotted a fossil in it..hha..haa. But, I placed it in the jar of "his treasures" because I liked it, my son was playing with it and gave it to me as a gift. I also placed it into my jar because I thought maybe I was the second person ever to touch this rock(my little one being the first) Now how cool would that be? So in the jar it went.
The second item was my grocery bill...you may think I am crazy(though, that is still open for discussion). I placed it in my jar because I am blessed and grateful for
the money to purchase food for my family. So many don't have the means to do this task. So I feel like it deserved the gratitude it was worth...so in it went.
I was searching for the perfect words of the Father to place in this entry...and BAM!!!! Flipped right to these(he is too cool!)
Psalm 139:14
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful
Psalm 107:9
For he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things
The first item I placed in my jar was a rock...nothing great and awesome about it. Though, I think I spotted a fossil in it..hha..haa. But, I placed it in the jar of "his treasures" because I liked it, my son was playing with it and gave it to me as a gift. I also placed it into my jar because I thought maybe I was the second person ever to touch this rock(my little one being the first) Now how cool would that be? So in the jar it went.
The second item was my grocery bill...you may think I am crazy(though, that is still open for discussion). I placed it in my jar because I am blessed and grateful for
the money to purchase food for my family. So many don't have the means to do this task. So I feel like it deserved the gratitude it was worth...so in it went.
I was searching for the perfect words of the Father to place in this entry...and BAM!!!! Flipped right to these(he is too cool!)
Psalm 139:14
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful
Psalm 107:9
For he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
The old jar
Hello...all!!! Hope you and yours are doing well. The weather is finally starting to remember that it is summer and making its appearance now and again. It has been nearly 4 1/2 years since Elijah died...I have started to get "creative" in the way that I deal with my grief and utter pain of not having him in my everyday and night life. I wanted to share with you something that I briefly read in a book, but I am expanding on it a little and will keep you posted on if it really works for me or not. I hope to also find some scripture to offer...maybe in the next post.
I have just received a whole box of old canning jars from a friend(she must know that I can't ever say no when people offer). So my brain has been hard at it to think of what I was going to do with all my little glass gifts. Got me thinking...yes, I do think from time to time...surprise!!!! So, I decided to lift my spirits a little and make it a little "collect ALL jar". Collecting things that I see, that... for a moment bring me joy and a glimpse into our wonderful creator.
What, you ask am I planning on placing into the jar???? Well, I don't really know yet. HE has not yet given me a "treasure" to place into my jar.(Always HIS timing, not mine). But I am going to make time to look at the gifts around me. Rocks, leaves, maybe even a lighting bug or two...don't worry animal activists, I will set them free. I want to be able to look at something small that captures my eye and my heart, placing it into an sad, lonely, empty jar. Slowly, filling it up to the top. Later, being able to recall in my memory the joy that each and every item in the jar gave to me. Filling my heart with hope and happiness like the treasures filled my jar.
God is good and always provides small treasures to us in his name.
I have just received a whole box of old canning jars from a friend(she must know that I can't ever say no when people offer). So my brain has been hard at it to think of what I was going to do with all my little glass gifts. Got me thinking...yes, I do think from time to time...surprise!!!! So, I decided to lift my spirits a little and make it a little "collect ALL jar". Collecting things that I see, that... for a moment bring me joy and a glimpse into our wonderful creator.
What, you ask am I planning on placing into the jar???? Well, I don't really know yet. HE has not yet given me a "treasure" to place into my jar.(Always HIS timing, not mine). But I am going to make time to look at the gifts around me. Rocks, leaves, maybe even a lighting bug or two...don't worry animal activists, I will set them free. I want to be able to look at something small that captures my eye and my heart, placing it into an sad, lonely, empty jar. Slowly, filling it up to the top. Later, being able to recall in my memory the joy that each and every item in the jar gave to me. Filling my heart with hope and happiness like the treasures filled my jar.
God is good and always provides small treasures to us in his name.
Friday, May 22, 2009
Waiting out the wait
No, I have not fallen off the face of the planet...though if feels like it...have not been feeling well...Don't worry,I don't believe it is anything too serious. But while I have been having blood tests done, I am reminded once again that I am not mortal...got me thinking about the when, where and how I will leave this world. I know we usually don't get the "heads up" on that one, but I often use the term "waiting out the wait" or "out waiting the wait"(you can let me know what is grammatically correct). You can take that a few different ways, but for me in this life..."I am waiting"...waiting for when I am in Heaven, waiting for my service on earth do be done, waiting to be reunited with other believing loved ones..and most of all waiting to be in the presence of "HIM."
I have a new understanding of the "wait" not only since becoming a believer, but also at the loses that have happened to our family over the last few years...in the last five years we have lost so many that we love, cherish and miss daily.
Ok...get ready..I am going to say a scary word to some of you ...but death(there I said it) has a different look to me. Don't get me wrong...I want to see my kids grow up, meet my grand kids..etc. I want to do good things for those around me and my community, I want to retire, get old and work at Wal-mart handing out happy face stickers to all the kids(little joke around here due to lack of a 401K).
Get ready...going to say it again. Death looks less scary...inviting...comforting and most of all HOME. So I wait as if I am going on the best anticipated vacation EVER. Packing nothing but the love that has been passed to me. Waiting...for the chance to hold my Elijah who I never really got to know and for the first time meet my other baby...though we have never laid eyes on each other...I am quite sure I will know them when I see them. I pray that with one embrace my special children feel all the love that I have had and been saving for only them all these years. So until I am called HOME...I wait. Some days the wait seems short, like time on earth is going so fast but other days it seems like I am just standing still...as I am waiting out the wait.
I have a new understanding of the "wait" not only since becoming a believer, but also at the loses that have happened to our family over the last few years...in the last five years we have lost so many that we love, cherish and miss daily.
Ok...get ready..I am going to say a scary word to some of you ...but death(there I said it) has a different look to me. Don't get me wrong...I want to see my kids grow up, meet my grand kids..etc. I want to do good things for those around me and my community, I want to retire, get old and work at Wal-mart handing out happy face stickers to all the kids(little joke around here due to lack of a 401K).
Get ready...going to say it again. Death looks less scary...inviting...comforting and most of all HOME. So I wait as if I am going on the best anticipated vacation EVER. Packing nothing but the love that has been passed to me. Waiting...for the chance to hold my Elijah who I never really got to know and for the first time meet my other baby...though we have never laid eyes on each other...I am quite sure I will know them when I see them. I pray that with one embrace my special children feel all the love that I have had and been saving for only them all these years. So until I am called HOME...I wait. Some days the wait seems short, like time on earth is going so fast but other days it seems like I am just standing still...as I am waiting out the wait.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
I (with his help) did it!
All of you that know me...know that I LOVE MT. DEW!!! Or even a cheap mark off, Hillbilly Holler is my fave. But for lent I decided to refrain from my evil little crutch. I didn't realize how much I depended on it...not the caffeine just the taste. So I did it...not once did I "fall off of the wagon". And can you believe this...I still have not had one drop of Mt. Dew even after Easter. I can't even believe it myself. GOD is good and way stronger than I am...thank goodness for prayer...always listens and never fails...I started writing this email on 4/21 and still on 5/6 have not had any...I know it seems silly but to me it is a very big deal. I have not been feeling well lately so trying to change my "life style eating habits" hopefully will help. Now if I could just learn to stomach...peas...ugh..yuck!
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
The cross
I am so excited about this Easter...(no not just because I can drink Mt. Dew again)
Ever since I became a believer...every "Christian" holiday means more and more to me every year. Mainly because during the past year, I feel like I have grown so much in my faith in God. Do I know everything...aaahhh NO...do I have so much more to learn...aaahhh YEAH!
I am truely so greatful for the price that Jesus paid for all of us. I could not imagine knowing how your life would end, and in such a violent way...yet he died for us anyway even knowing what was ahead of him.
So may you all be full in the spirit of Easter and not only for the PEEPS or tasty food or candy eggs...but for the CROSS.
He came and left...so we could leave and come to HIM.
REJOICE IN HIM AND HIS FATHER!!!
BEAUTIFUL CHRISTIAN SISTER
by Maya Angelou
'A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ
that a man should have to seek Him first to find her.'
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not shouting 'I'm clean livin''
I'm whispering 'I was lost, Now I'm found and forgiven.'
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak and need His strength to carry on.
When I say.. 'I am a Christian' I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible but, God believes I am worth it.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I still feel the sting of pain..
I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner Who received God's good grace, somehow!
Ever since I became a believer...every "Christian" holiday means more and more to me every year. Mainly because during the past year, I feel like I have grown so much in my faith in God. Do I know everything...aaahhh NO...do I have so much more to learn...aaahhh YEAH!
I am truely so greatful for the price that Jesus paid for all of us. I could not imagine knowing how your life would end, and in such a violent way...yet he died for us anyway even knowing what was ahead of him.
So may you all be full in the spirit of Easter and not only for the PEEPS or tasty food or candy eggs...but for the CROSS.
He came and left...so we could leave and come to HIM.
REJOICE IN HIM AND HIS FATHER!!!
BEAUTIFUL CHRISTIAN SISTER
by Maya Angelou
'A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ
that a man should have to seek Him first to find her.'
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not shouting 'I'm clean livin''
I'm whispering 'I was lost, Now I'm found and forgiven.'
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak and need His strength to carry on.
When I say.. 'I am a Christian' I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible but, God believes I am worth it.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I still feel the sting of pain..
I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner Who received God's good grace, somehow!
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Ok, done with that!
Though I will not apologize for yesterday's post...I was speaking what was in my heart and the whole reason I post things is to see my progress in my journey(or in this case regression).
Yesterdays rant and rage is over and done with...My FATHER...sat me down last night and gave me a firm "talking to"...if he was my earthly father, I so would be grounded until the end of summer. He basically told me to get over it...and that I am not God that HE IS...there is no disputing that statement. So as I am still frustrated and burdened by the issue, he knows my heart and hears my cry to him...He helped me see that even though some persons openly express their disbelief and feelings about their "unwanted" child(ren)...they are GOD's first and foremost...and they are wanted...BY HIM.
Yesterdays rant and rage is over and done with...My FATHER...sat me down last night and gave me a firm "talking to"...if he was my earthly father, I so would be grounded until the end of summer. He basically told me to get over it...and that I am not God that HE IS...there is no disputing that statement. So as I am still frustrated and burdened by the issue, he knows my heart and hears my cry to him...He helped me see that even though some persons openly express their disbelief and feelings about their "unwanted" child(ren)...they are GOD's first and foremost...and they are wanted...BY HIM.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
A weak and bitter heart
Some of you may know that we got our Foster/Adoption licence last year and have not had a placement yet or an adoption call. Since we have had so many issues getting pregnant and dealing with the "what if something bad happens again" we hoped that we could add to our family by adoption.
So all of this "WHEN" and "WAITING" has been heavy on my heart anyway; but lately, the evil one has taken my heart in his hand, and will not let go...slowly squeezing it, making me bitter and angry at so many in this world. IT is everywhere, in the news, in your community, in your own backyard. People who show so little respect for the creation of life. Like the creating a life is no big deal, comparing it to filling the car up with gas, or buying a shirt.
So many families that I know right now would love to have a child, but are stricken with infertility. Or as I am writing this...sitting by their dying child's bed...crying out to GOD to spare their child and make them healthy again. I struggle with this from time to time...the carelessness of some people's actions and comments about not "wanting" children they(and God) have created. I am not questioning God's decisions in life, he is GOD. My heart goes to the single, pregnant young women who doesn't know what to do or where to turn, stricken with so many fears and an uncertain future. That would be such a scary place to be by its self, let alone if they also did not have loving family and friends supporting and helping them...UGH! I struggle with the careless actions of people who are supposed to be adults that actually say that they do not want the child they carry. I am pretty sure we all know where babies come from since the 6th grade...so saying that you don't understand how it happened seems a little silly.
Please pray for me as I struggle with this bitterness, that my Lord will show his grand words to me at the right time. That I will have a renewed heart in trusting in HIM and his HEAVENLY wisdom and not the wisdom that I think I posses.
Please pray also for the children that have parents that openly say that they regret having them or saying they are a mistake or unwanted...those words will forever ring in the ears of those children...Though no love is close in comparison to our heavenly FATHER, pray that at least one person in that child's earthly life will show them kindness, compassion and LOVE.
So all of this "WHEN" and "WAITING" has been heavy on my heart anyway; but lately, the evil one has taken my heart in his hand, and will not let go...slowly squeezing it, making me bitter and angry at so many in this world. IT is everywhere, in the news, in your community, in your own backyard. People who show so little respect for the creation of life. Like the creating a life is no big deal, comparing it to filling the car up with gas, or buying a shirt.
So many families that I know right now would love to have a child, but are stricken with infertility. Or as I am writing this...sitting by their dying child's bed...crying out to GOD to spare their child and make them healthy again. I struggle with this from time to time...the carelessness of some people's actions and comments about not "wanting" children they(and God) have created. I am not questioning God's decisions in life, he is GOD. My heart goes to the single, pregnant young women who doesn't know what to do or where to turn, stricken with so many fears and an uncertain future. That would be such a scary place to be by its self, let alone if they also did not have loving family and friends supporting and helping them...UGH! I struggle with the careless actions of people who are supposed to be adults that actually say that they do not want the child they carry. I am pretty sure we all know where babies come from since the 6th grade...so saying that you don't understand how it happened seems a little silly.
Please pray for me as I struggle with this bitterness, that my Lord will show his grand words to me at the right time. That I will have a renewed heart in trusting in HIM and his HEAVENLY wisdom and not the wisdom that I think I posses.
Please pray also for the children that have parents that openly say that they regret having them or saying they are a mistake or unwanted...those words will forever ring in the ears of those children...Though no love is close in comparison to our heavenly FATHER, pray that at least one person in that child's earthly life will show them kindness, compassion and LOVE.
Monday, March 2, 2009
What did I give up for Lent?
Our church is going about Lent in a different way this year...they are asking that we read through Psalm 46-1...for the days between Ash Wednesday and Easter...they also thought people may want to refrain from something during this time...some are fasting...but I know that I would most likely end up in the hospital if I did that, so I was trying to think of something that I enjoy and brings me comfort and would offer a struggle to refrain from..you guessed it, it is Mt. Dew. I wanted to give up something that brings me comfort to lean more on God and how he can comfort me. I think we all rely on some "thing" to comfort us from time to time...don't get me wrong...I am not saying that anything is wrong or bad about that...but I was putting these "things" high on my list, relying on my little fountain friend far to much.
He brings me comfort, He provides less stress, He takes my worries away, He is my safety "to" the storm, "in" the storm, and "away" from the storm...
My fave verses this week are:(hope His words give you strength and comfort)
Matthew 6:34
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Psalm 40
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
4 Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods
Psalm 46:10
Be still, and know that I am God
He brings me comfort, He provides less stress, He takes my worries away, He is my safety "to" the storm, "in" the storm, and "away" from the storm...
My fave verses this week are:(hope His words give you strength and comfort)
Matthew 6:34
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Psalm 40
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
4 Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods
Psalm 46:10
Be still, and know that I am God
Monday, February 16, 2009
A tear for the helpless
I was sent this by two people and felt that I needed to share with all of you...it will grab at you...you will cry and rethink how you live your life and how you treat those who can not care for themselves...and if it doesn't change anything within you...you may need to reevaluate who you are and what you hope to be.
We have pondered the thought of adoption for many years...it is even more branded into my heart after this video.
Make sure you are in a place where you can watch the whole clip...you will feel like falling to your knees and praying for these two children(and their older sister) and the others that go unnoticed everyday, and suffer in silence.
How God's heart must be breaking also to see his children neglected and suffer such pain...but even through this...he is a always and never failing magnificent God... in all things...glory be to God.
I wish I had some scripture to add to this...but I am thinking that all of the good book applies...right now I am humbled and speachless...hoping and praying God will let me know what I am to do after seeing this video.
This group that helped these little ones has a site called village2village
Dont forget to put a pause on the music below so you can hear the video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v7ZQUzr0yo
We have pondered the thought of adoption for many years...it is even more branded into my heart after this video.
Make sure you are in a place where you can watch the whole clip...you will feel like falling to your knees and praying for these two children(and their older sister) and the others that go unnoticed everyday, and suffer in silence.
How God's heart must be breaking also to see his children neglected and suffer such pain...but even through this...he is a always and never failing magnificent God... in all things...glory be to God.
I wish I had some scripture to add to this...but I am thinking that all of the good book applies...right now I am humbled and speachless...hoping and praying God will let me know what I am to do after seeing this video.
This group that helped these little ones has a site called village2village
Dont forget to put a pause on the music below so you can hear the video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v7ZQUzr0yo
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Help with this question.
A good friend and I were having a great DEEP conversation about faith at our local Panera Bread resturant(something about tasty food and conversation at that place-I could stay there for hours and just talk) Though we talked about many things, this was the question that was brought up. Hoping you can all place some input or light on this question....ALL comments are welcome...but don't answer quickly...I think I have changed my thoughts many times the more I think about it. No comment is wrong...so feel free to voice all thoughts.
ok ...here we go.
If faith is a gift from God that no man should boast...then why were Abraham and the others in the faith chapter commended?
Ok...here was my thought...but like I said...I have changed it many times...
Boasting is prideful...so you should not boast about yourself and your faith since the faith you have is not your doing...it is a gift of GOD. And Abraham, Job, etc were commented because the "showed" their faith...though their life. By trials and suffering...they were not prideful in their faith...they relized that everything comes from him, through him and to him are all things...that the glory of all is HIS.
Any ideas on scripture????
ok ...here we go.
If faith is a gift from God that no man should boast...then why were Abraham and the others in the faith chapter commended?
Ok...here was my thought...but like I said...I have changed it many times...
Boasting is prideful...so you should not boast about yourself and your faith since the faith you have is not your doing...it is a gift of GOD. And Abraham, Job, etc were commented because the "showed" their faith...though their life. By trials and suffering...they were not prideful in their faith...they relized that everything comes from him, through him and to him are all things...that the glory of all is HIS.
Any ideas on scripture????
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Snowflakes
We often hear the phrase "no two snowflakes are alike".
I love nature...not winter so much, but nature in general. I love to take pictures of things like frosty trees and snowflakes falling(those these pictures never turn out). The other day it started to snow while the sun was out and an almost clear sky...where were the snow flakes coming from? No clouds, no snow right? As my daughter and I got into the car...we were amazed my the HUGE flakes...landing ever so gently on the windows of the car..and with the sun shining down...you could make out every little detail of each flake...(and of course is was so cold so they did not melt right away.)
We were wondering if any looked the same...but as much as we could tell...NO, they were all different...no two were alike.
I believe we are so much like those snowflakes...no two are alike. Yes, we all resemble someone...same hair color, same eye color, but no one is exactly alike. With all of the millions and millions of people that have been and are...God still is so amazing and creative that he makes us all individual, separate from the others. I try to remind myself of this as I look in the mirror worrying about this or that...but I am exactly how he created me to be...individual, unique, special...just ME. If he takes the time to create every snowflake individually by his hands...I think I need to rejoice in the hands that created...me...
I love nature...not winter so much, but nature in general. I love to take pictures of things like frosty trees and snowflakes falling(those these pictures never turn out). The other day it started to snow while the sun was out and an almost clear sky...where were the snow flakes coming from? No clouds, no snow right? As my daughter and I got into the car...we were amazed my the HUGE flakes...landing ever so gently on the windows of the car..and with the sun shining down...you could make out every little detail of each flake...(and of course is was so cold so they did not melt right away.)
We were wondering if any looked the same...but as much as we could tell...NO, they were all different...no two were alike.
I believe we are so much like those snowflakes...no two are alike. Yes, we all resemble someone...same hair color, same eye color, but no one is exactly alike. With all of the millions and millions of people that have been and are...God still is so amazing and creative that he makes us all individual, separate from the others. I try to remind myself of this as I look in the mirror worrying about this or that...but I am exactly how he created me to be...individual, unique, special...just ME. If he takes the time to create every snowflake individually by his hands...I think I need to rejoice in the hands that created...me...
Sunday, February 1, 2009
A reminder
Just a quick reminder to continue to do your self breast exams...heard today of yet one more gal that has been diagnosed with breast cancer. I know that the media always does a lot of reminders in October but then we don't hear about again until the next October. Remember you are your best advocate for your body...if you don't think something is right...go get it checked...and if your doctor won't listen to you and your concerns...get another one.
Happy squeezing!
Happy squeezing!
Friday, January 16, 2009
A challenge
In my last post I talked about prayer...I would like to challenge anyone who lays their eyes upon this to...Pray. Pray for someone that is hurting, who is sick, or dying. To the family of those who died, or to anyone needing the love of God. You don't even need to know the persons name...just pray.
I though I would share with you quick about a trip I had to our local grocery store before Christmas...the guy who bags groceries and carries them to the car for you, struck up a conversation with me..and of course I started having a conversation back(which is so out of my character...you all know that I am so shy and never am talkative..ha..)...as he was placing my bags in the car...he started talking about having to take care of his Dads house and that it is giving him so much trouble...there was a house fire and in order to sell it he has to fix it up...as we talked more he went on to say that his sister left town because she didn't want to deal with it...and left it for him...just so you know this young man was just that...young. My heart started to feel for him...such big responsibilities for such a young guy. But my mind was thinking...why was his Dad not helping or a Mom. Then it came out before I could ask... no mention of his Mom...but his Dad died in that house fire. I still don't know his name...but I pray for him. God knows who you are praying for even without a name. I have seen him a couple of times since...we always talk and I try to say something comforting and ask how he is doing...and always end our conversation...I will be praying for you. Somehow whether you are a believer or not...knowing that SOMEONE...ANYONE...is praying for you is comforting. Many times over the last few years we had many praying for us...some of who we did not know...but OH...could we feel it...it is some how miraculous, magical and LOVING.
So...I challenge myself and you...Pray...you may never know the difference it will make to someone.
We are the hands of GOD...take this challenge and be HIS servant.
I though I would share with you quick about a trip I had to our local grocery store before Christmas...the guy who bags groceries and carries them to the car for you, struck up a conversation with me..and of course I started having a conversation back(which is so out of my character...you all know that I am so shy and never am talkative..ha..)...as he was placing my bags in the car...he started talking about having to take care of his Dads house and that it is giving him so much trouble...there was a house fire and in order to sell it he has to fix it up...as we talked more he went on to say that his sister left town because she didn't want to deal with it...and left it for him...just so you know this young man was just that...young. My heart started to feel for him...such big responsibilities for such a young guy. But my mind was thinking...why was his Dad not helping or a Mom. Then it came out before I could ask... no mention of his Mom...but his Dad died in that house fire. I still don't know his name...but I pray for him. God knows who you are praying for even without a name. I have seen him a couple of times since...we always talk and I try to say something comforting and ask how he is doing...and always end our conversation...I will be praying for you. Somehow whether you are a believer or not...knowing that SOMEONE...ANYONE...is praying for you is comforting. Many times over the last few years we had many praying for us...some of who we did not know...but OH...could we feel it...it is some how miraculous, magical and LOVING.
So...I challenge myself and you...Pray...you may never know the difference it will make to someone.
We are the hands of GOD...take this challenge and be HIS servant.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Tuckered out
Have not written a post for some time...I have not been feeling well and have been saving my energy for my little munchkins. The other day was quite exhausting...I was wiped out by 5pm. Heard the news of many sad things...so I was literally praying ALL day...death, sickness, broken hearts, broken lives...it was so worth it...the one thing I could give to so many hurting...it was nothing compared to the suffering of others. I prayed for these people to have God's comfort, accept his love, and to follow his ways. I don't want you to think that this is the first time I had prayed and because it was new...it made me tired.
It was just that oh....so many where needing prayers. I kind of felt like I had a split personality...one going on as normal with the daily chores, housework, watching the kids, cooking. The other in a constant conversation with God...
I am amazed with his commitment to listening to all of our requests.
Ever since I have become a believer, I have tried hard not to do the "bargaining prayer", if you give me this ONE thing then I will ______________. That is not how God intended prayer to be...he wants us to have an intimate conversation with him...a conversation about thankfulness for the blessings he has given us, our failures, our hopes and our needs...real needs...not wants. Does he always answer our prayers, YES each and everyone, though it may not always be answered the way "we" want it to be. But like any loving FATHER, he knows what is best for us, knowing that maybe that prayer that we consider unanswered was the best thing for his child.
Paul prayed continually...he...was just that... a prayer...I can only imagine how tired he was at the end of the day.
Psalm 17:6
I call on you, O God, for you will answer me;
give ear to me and hear my prayer.
Psalm 66:20
Praise be to God,
who has not rejected my prayer
or withheld his love from me!
1 Thessalonians 5:17-18
pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
It was just that oh....so many where needing prayers. I kind of felt like I had a split personality...one going on as normal with the daily chores, housework, watching the kids, cooking. The other in a constant conversation with God...
I am amazed with his commitment to listening to all of our requests.
Ever since I have become a believer, I have tried hard not to do the "bargaining prayer", if you give me this ONE thing then I will ______________. That is not how God intended prayer to be...he wants us to have an intimate conversation with him...a conversation about thankfulness for the blessings he has given us, our failures, our hopes and our needs...real needs...not wants. Does he always answer our prayers, YES each and everyone, though it may not always be answered the way "we" want it to be. But like any loving FATHER, he knows what is best for us, knowing that maybe that prayer that we consider unanswered was the best thing for his child.
Paul prayed continually...he...was just that... a prayer...I can only imagine how tired he was at the end of the day.
Psalm 17:6
I call on you, O God, for you will answer me;
give ear to me and hear my prayer.
Psalm 66:20
Praise be to God,
who has not rejected my prayer
or withheld his love from me!
1 Thessalonians 5:17-18
pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
The placement of doors
I was recently talking with a good friend of mine about "God's plan" for the two of us and which doors he is going to place before us. Both of us have had grief strike us in different ways the last few years, her losing her husband and me with my Glory babies. God works in wonderful, but very mysterious ways. He is always placing doors in front of us...some we choose for ourselves with the free will he gives us...others are just a factor of this broken world we live in. Some doors are full of celebration, others are full of sorrow and grief. Earlier this week my friend joked...I have already had door #1...I am ready for door #2...and we laughed...oh, so true my heart felt the same way!!! I was thinking, now what do I do...where do I go from "HERE"...what is your plan for me..wanting to "move" to the next door he is ready to give me.
I always envision God standing to the side of a big red velvet stage curtain saying "OH...my child not yet...you can't peek...you can't see ALL of my plan for you. Not until you are with me will you see the whole story...the play is still being written for you".
He always has a great way of placing friends and our conversations to "subtly" remind me of his promises and faithfulness.
I always envision God standing to the side of a big red velvet stage curtain saying "OH...my child not yet...you can't peek...you can't see ALL of my plan for you. Not until you are with me will you see the whole story...the play is still being written for you".
He always has a great way of placing friends and our conversations to "subtly" remind me of his promises and faithfulness.
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