Though I will not apologize for yesterday's post...I was speaking what was in my heart and the whole reason I post things is to see my progress in my journey(or in this case regression).
Yesterdays rant and rage is over and done with...My FATHER...sat me down last night and gave me a firm "talking to"...if he was my earthly father, I so would be grounded until the end of summer. He basically told me to get over it...and that I am not God that HE IS...there is no disputing that statement. So as I am still frustrated and burdened by the issue, he knows my heart and hears my cry to him...He helped me see that even though some persons openly express their disbelief and feelings about their "unwanted" child(ren)...they are GOD's first and foremost...and they are wanted...BY HIM.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
A weak and bitter heart
Some of you may know that we got our Foster/Adoption licence last year and have not had a placement yet or an adoption call. Since we have had so many issues getting pregnant and dealing with the "what if something bad happens again" we hoped that we could add to our family by adoption.
So all of this "WHEN" and "WAITING" has been heavy on my heart anyway; but lately, the evil one has taken my heart in his hand, and will not let go...slowly squeezing it, making me bitter and angry at so many in this world. IT is everywhere, in the news, in your community, in your own backyard. People who show so little respect for the creation of life. Like the creating a life is no big deal, comparing it to filling the car up with gas, or buying a shirt.
So many families that I know right now would love to have a child, but are stricken with infertility. Or as I am writing this...sitting by their dying child's bed...crying out to GOD to spare their child and make them healthy again. I struggle with this from time to time...the carelessness of some people's actions and comments about not "wanting" children they(and God) have created. I am not questioning God's decisions in life, he is GOD. My heart goes to the single, pregnant young women who doesn't know what to do or where to turn, stricken with so many fears and an uncertain future. That would be such a scary place to be by its self, let alone if they also did not have loving family and friends supporting and helping them...UGH! I struggle with the careless actions of people who are supposed to be adults that actually say that they do not want the child they carry. I am pretty sure we all know where babies come from since the 6th grade...so saying that you don't understand how it happened seems a little silly.
Please pray for me as I struggle with this bitterness, that my Lord will show his grand words to me at the right time. That I will have a renewed heart in trusting in HIM and his HEAVENLY wisdom and not the wisdom that I think I posses.
Please pray also for the children that have parents that openly say that they regret having them or saying they are a mistake or unwanted...those words will forever ring in the ears of those children...Though no love is close in comparison to our heavenly FATHER, pray that at least one person in that child's earthly life will show them kindness, compassion and LOVE.
So all of this "WHEN" and "WAITING" has been heavy on my heart anyway; but lately, the evil one has taken my heart in his hand, and will not let go...slowly squeezing it, making me bitter and angry at so many in this world. IT is everywhere, in the news, in your community, in your own backyard. People who show so little respect for the creation of life. Like the creating a life is no big deal, comparing it to filling the car up with gas, or buying a shirt.
So many families that I know right now would love to have a child, but are stricken with infertility. Or as I am writing this...sitting by their dying child's bed...crying out to GOD to spare their child and make them healthy again. I struggle with this from time to time...the carelessness of some people's actions and comments about not "wanting" children they(and God) have created. I am not questioning God's decisions in life, he is GOD. My heart goes to the single, pregnant young women who doesn't know what to do or where to turn, stricken with so many fears and an uncertain future. That would be such a scary place to be by its self, let alone if they also did not have loving family and friends supporting and helping them...UGH! I struggle with the careless actions of people who are supposed to be adults that actually say that they do not want the child they carry. I am pretty sure we all know where babies come from since the 6th grade...so saying that you don't understand how it happened seems a little silly.
Please pray for me as I struggle with this bitterness, that my Lord will show his grand words to me at the right time. That I will have a renewed heart in trusting in HIM and his HEAVENLY wisdom and not the wisdom that I think I posses.
Please pray also for the children that have parents that openly say that they regret having them or saying they are a mistake or unwanted...those words will forever ring in the ears of those children...Though no love is close in comparison to our heavenly FATHER, pray that at least one person in that child's earthly life will show them kindness, compassion and LOVE.
Monday, March 2, 2009
What did I give up for Lent?
Our church is going about Lent in a different way this year...they are asking that we read through Psalm 46-1...for the days between Ash Wednesday and Easter...they also thought people may want to refrain from something during this time...some are fasting...but I know that I would most likely end up in the hospital if I did that, so I was trying to think of something that I enjoy and brings me comfort and would offer a struggle to refrain from..you guessed it, it is Mt. Dew. I wanted to give up something that brings me comfort to lean more on God and how he can comfort me. I think we all rely on some "thing" to comfort us from time to time...don't get me wrong...I am not saying that anything is wrong or bad about that...but I was putting these "things" high on my list, relying on my little fountain friend far to much.
He brings me comfort, He provides less stress, He takes my worries away, He is my safety "to" the storm, "in" the storm, and "away" from the storm...
My fave verses this week are:(hope His words give you strength and comfort)
Matthew 6:34
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Psalm 40
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
4 Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods
Psalm 46:10
Be still, and know that I am God
He brings me comfort, He provides less stress, He takes my worries away, He is my safety "to" the storm, "in" the storm, and "away" from the storm...
My fave verses this week are:(hope His words give you strength and comfort)
Matthew 6:34
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Psalm 40
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
4 Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods
Psalm 46:10
Be still, and know that I am God
Monday, February 16, 2009
A tear for the helpless
I was sent this by two people and felt that I needed to share with all of you...it will grab at you...you will cry and rethink how you live your life and how you treat those who can not care for themselves...and if it doesn't change anything within you...you may need to reevaluate who you are and what you hope to be.
We have pondered the thought of adoption for many years...it is even more branded into my heart after this video.
Make sure you are in a place where you can watch the whole clip...you will feel like falling to your knees and praying for these two children(and their older sister) and the others that go unnoticed everyday, and suffer in silence.
How God's heart must be breaking also to see his children neglected and suffer such pain...but even through this...he is a always and never failing magnificent God... in all things...glory be to God.
I wish I had some scripture to add to this...but I am thinking that all of the good book applies...right now I am humbled and speachless...hoping and praying God will let me know what I am to do after seeing this video.
This group that helped these little ones has a site called village2village
Dont forget to put a pause on the music below so you can hear the video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v7ZQUzr0yo
We have pondered the thought of adoption for many years...it is even more branded into my heart after this video.
Make sure you are in a place where you can watch the whole clip...you will feel like falling to your knees and praying for these two children(and their older sister) and the others that go unnoticed everyday, and suffer in silence.
How God's heart must be breaking also to see his children neglected and suffer such pain...but even through this...he is a always and never failing magnificent God... in all things...glory be to God.
I wish I had some scripture to add to this...but I am thinking that all of the good book applies...right now I am humbled and speachless...hoping and praying God will let me know what I am to do after seeing this video.
This group that helped these little ones has a site called village2village
Dont forget to put a pause on the music below so you can hear the video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v7ZQUzr0yo
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Help with this question.
A good friend and I were having a great DEEP conversation about faith at our local Panera Bread resturant(something about tasty food and conversation at that place-I could stay there for hours and just talk) Though we talked about many things, this was the question that was brought up. Hoping you can all place some input or light on this question....ALL comments are welcome...but don't answer quickly...I think I have changed my thoughts many times the more I think about it. No comment is wrong...so feel free to voice all thoughts.
ok ...here we go.
If faith is a gift from God that no man should boast...then why were Abraham and the others in the faith chapter commended?
Ok...here was my thought...but like I said...I have changed it many times...
Boasting is prideful...so you should not boast about yourself and your faith since the faith you have is not your doing...it is a gift of GOD. And Abraham, Job, etc were commented because the "showed" their faith...though their life. By trials and suffering...they were not prideful in their faith...they relized that everything comes from him, through him and to him are all things...that the glory of all is HIS.
Any ideas on scripture????
ok ...here we go.
If faith is a gift from God that no man should boast...then why were Abraham and the others in the faith chapter commended?
Ok...here was my thought...but like I said...I have changed it many times...
Boasting is prideful...so you should not boast about yourself and your faith since the faith you have is not your doing...it is a gift of GOD. And Abraham, Job, etc were commented because the "showed" their faith...though their life. By trials and suffering...they were not prideful in their faith...they relized that everything comes from him, through him and to him are all things...that the glory of all is HIS.
Any ideas on scripture????
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Snowflakes
We often hear the phrase "no two snowflakes are alike".
I love nature...not winter so much, but nature in general. I love to take pictures of things like frosty trees and snowflakes falling(those these pictures never turn out). The other day it started to snow while the sun was out and an almost clear sky...where were the snow flakes coming from? No clouds, no snow right? As my daughter and I got into the car...we were amazed my the HUGE flakes...landing ever so gently on the windows of the car..and with the sun shining down...you could make out every little detail of each flake...(and of course is was so cold so they did not melt right away.)
We were wondering if any looked the same...but as much as we could tell...NO, they were all different...no two were alike.
I believe we are so much like those snowflakes...no two are alike. Yes, we all resemble someone...same hair color, same eye color, but no one is exactly alike. With all of the millions and millions of people that have been and are...God still is so amazing and creative that he makes us all individual, separate from the others. I try to remind myself of this as I look in the mirror worrying about this or that...but I am exactly how he created me to be...individual, unique, special...just ME. If he takes the time to create every snowflake individually by his hands...I think I need to rejoice in the hands that created...me...
I love nature...not winter so much, but nature in general. I love to take pictures of things like frosty trees and snowflakes falling(those these pictures never turn out). The other day it started to snow while the sun was out and an almost clear sky...where were the snow flakes coming from? No clouds, no snow right? As my daughter and I got into the car...we were amazed my the HUGE flakes...landing ever so gently on the windows of the car..and with the sun shining down...you could make out every little detail of each flake...(and of course is was so cold so they did not melt right away.)
We were wondering if any looked the same...but as much as we could tell...NO, they were all different...no two were alike.
I believe we are so much like those snowflakes...no two are alike. Yes, we all resemble someone...same hair color, same eye color, but no one is exactly alike. With all of the millions and millions of people that have been and are...God still is so amazing and creative that he makes us all individual, separate from the others. I try to remind myself of this as I look in the mirror worrying about this or that...but I am exactly how he created me to be...individual, unique, special...just ME. If he takes the time to create every snowflake individually by his hands...I think I need to rejoice in the hands that created...me...
Sunday, February 1, 2009
A reminder
Just a quick reminder to continue to do your self breast exams...heard today of yet one more gal that has been diagnosed with breast cancer. I know that the media always does a lot of reminders in October but then we don't hear about again until the next October. Remember you are your best advocate for your body...if you don't think something is right...go get it checked...and if your doctor won't listen to you and your concerns...get another one.
Happy squeezing!
Happy squeezing!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)